July 03, 2017
After my daughter was born, I ended up spending even more time on mindless, fruitless activities -- like scrolling through my news feed while nursing. Despite my better judgement, Facebook and Instagram held me captive during those moments.
Those moments add up rather quickly. If you’re a mother, you know how insanely quickly your kids grow up… and if you’re not a parent, the best times in life still seem to slip by far too quickly.
And that's when the realization hit me: I feel like I never have enough time because I never have quality time. My mind is constantly stuck in 'get things done' or ‘social media muck’ mode, rather than enjoying the present moment. My present moment.
My distractions include:
Reading Hands Free Mama allowed me to reflect on what cheated me of my own happiness.
I was able to be enlightened thanks to Hands Free Mama by Rachel Macy Stafford. The book is her journey of rediscovering what matters most in her life by eliminating what robbed her of joy. By setting aside those meaningless distractions, she could open her life for soul-to-soul connections with others.
Perfectionism, checking her cell phone and email inbox along with her inability to say “no” to volunteerism are just a few examples she wrote about in her book. For Rachel, these distractions took away her ability to be present to her family. It is just me, or is Rachel expressing a reality so many of us live in?
Are these technological and mundane distractions just part of being an adult?
Well, of course my family deserves a clean home, needs fresh laundry and well-rounded meals each day. However, Rachel helped me come to the realization that my standards I hold myself to are too high, and quite frankly, only expected from myself.
Okay, now I have to be completely honest about my distractions of social.
It’s true, I still pass the time scrolling through updates and images of others. It has gotten increasingly worse since my daughter Francesca was born. I admit that I still scroll through my newsfeed sometimes while nursing her, but...
Hands Free Mama gave me a kick in the rear-end facing my new time-filler addiction. I set small goals of less screen time by creating boundaries with my cell phone. I won’t have my cell phone out during meals or when I have committed my time to something else.
By living in the moment, I get to be fully present to my children, my husband...my life! Trust me, reading a book doesn’t automatically mean I’m completely self-corrected. I know this will be a process and I am just at the beginning. Rachel even suggests to readers to take their time reading Hands Free Mama. Not due to reading complexity, but rather applying what you have read into your life. Like with any self-help literature, that is the difficult part.
What do you really want from today?
Take 10 minutes for yourself and spend it on personal reflection. For many of us, these 10 minutes may be the only time you give yourself all day.
My 10 minutes is usually spent in prayer, asking for wisdom, patience, strength...and on and on. I’ve also incorporated my felt letter board in my 10 minutes as a creative outlet and reflection. How can my felt letter board reflect my life, or my family's life, in this moment? How can I be firmly rooted in what I want today?
Sometimes it’s nice to spend that “me-time” not asking for things, but being grateful for what I have been given -- and that’s spelled out in black and white on my letterboard, as a reflection of the quality time I’ve been blessed to accumulate in this life.
Here’s to sharing life, letter by letter,
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